The more I think about it, the more I wish it was real. I want everything to go as planned; I talk to him online, I find him at school, and we live happily ever after. But really? How often does "happy ever after" come? I wish I could talk to him. I wish he could just finally go on Myspace and add me. Lol. I wish I could be his knight in shining armor and save him like last time, but this time I'll introduce myself. This is weird. Me liking a guy I hardly know. Could it be his masterful skill of being a chef that draws me to him? All I could do right now is just stand afar and admire him, hoping that my "one day" will come.
     For the past 2 night, I've been having dreams of him. Well, more of me looking for him. The first one was when I was singing "Ordinary People" by Asher Book. Instead of him coming, Asher comes out of nowhere and sings with me. Of course I'm happy, but I'm not satisfied. Instead I am looking around as I sing, hoping that he is there. But he's not. The second one was when I'm in a certain type of building. I don't want to explain because you guys will just be confused. I see that Kevin guy from orientation and he gives me a kiss. It's weird I know. But at that second, we both love each other. But, when we depart I question myself. I ask myself why I am doing this. I like another person and that person isn't Kevin. Instead, I look out windows hoping to see him in his car, but he isn't.
    What is that supposed to mean? Looking for someone who isn't there? All I could say is 2 more days! My only fear of everything is:
1) He is actually gay, which would suck in my part but could be useful in the long run.
2) He falls for that Caitlyn girl. I would really be jealous though.
     I sound like a creepy stalker. I admire a guy who probably doesn't know I exist. Ahh well... That's life. 2 more days!
     On the bright side, I cleaned my sister's filthy room. It's really clean now. I also have a master plan on how I want my room to look like if I remodeled it. I kinda cleaned my room today, but then I stopped, like how I always do. Instead, I watched 3 episodes of Grey's Anatomy. I also picked up Jen from the mall and we went to Banana Republic to see Axell. I betcha one of the workers thinks we're weird. We were running around, peering behind corners and hiding behind manniquins. Lol. After that, we go to the Angel Pix place and take more pictures! Then I drive Jen home. Now I'm at home. Starving. I think Axell's mom wanted me to come over to have some food, but I'm not gonna go if Axell's not at home! That's weird! I guess his mom doesn't hate me anymore. Yay!
     -Banhzaii
 
 
     I had difficult sleeping last night. I think I officially fell asleep around 2 or 3 AM. I woke up at 8 AM this morning to take a nice shower to wake me up. I was done before 8:30 and I had nothing to do. I don't eat breakfast anymore so I just drank a cup of soy milk. I got so bored so I started youtubing things while I waited for my hair to dry. I youtubed Milo Ventimiglia. [Me-low Ven-tuh-me-lee-uh] The "g" is silent in this case. He's my new favorite actor, alongside Patrick Dempsey. Around 9:10 AM, I was already out the door, in my car and heading out towards PCI.
    I got there almost half an hour early so I just relaxed in my car. I started singing along with the music on my ipod. LOL. By the time it was 9:45 AM, I decided to head out. When I got there, I got my folder and everything [they spelled my last name wrong!] Then, they led us to the conference room area where we sat in. I met a lot of new people. One was Janelle who knows Shian and goes to Piedmont Hills High. I met a few others, but they sat in the wrong table so they had to move. Another girl was Caitlyn [sp?]. She and i competeted against each other and she was the other one who got first place. Janelle got 3rd.
     So, we just went through everything for PCI. After 2 hours, it was time to pick up books and uniforms. Janelle and I went a little late because we had to fill out paper, by the time we got our books, a lot were already out, plus the tool kits. So we just got 2 books. We're actually supposed to get about 5 big books and a heavy tool kit. Good thing I didn't get it though because I'd have too much to carry. After we got books, we went to the "fishbowl" and got our uniforms. Janelle couldn't find hers but she found mines. Lol. I feel bad, I hecka just left her. I needed to go talk to somebody about De Anza and stuff so I had to leave her. SORRY.
     I went back down to the book room. They told us that the first 6 days of class, we had to be there at 7 AM but I wouldn't be able to make it because I had classes at 8:30 AM. So I talk to the chef about it and they just told me to call back and he'll hook me up with online classes for now. On the 6th day, that is when we're supposed to take our exam, so he told me to come in after De Anza and they'll issue me a test.
     Anyways, by the time I left, it was 12. I followed Allan Dale's map to Gunderson and I somehow actually made it there! LOL. When I got there, I only saw Brandon. I didn't change into my uniform so I was trying to aviod KJN Ernie and Tony. KJN Tony spotted me, but I got hecka lucky. He didn't yell at me! He was just talking to me about PCI and stuff. Hehe. Brandon was like, "Don't worry, you wont get in trouble because he likes you" But I was like, "STILL I'M GONNA GET INTO TROUBLE!" but I didn't! Oh Yesh! Lol. I stayed at the tournament for a hecka long time! Everyone left too! Well except Brandon, Bianca, Diane, Daniel, and Patty. Brandon was still performing. I didn't know how to get home so I just waited till the end. I said Hi to KJN Ernie and after half an hour after everything was done, Patty led me back on the freeway. We stopped by Katelyn's home to pick her up.
     OMG, her whole family isn't part of West Coast anymore! It's so sad! Anyways, we all headed out to Quickly's, but when we got there, I told them about Verde and it's happy hour. We decided to go to Verde instead so I led them to Verde. Kim met up with us too! After Verde, we all went to Hilltop to explore. The bought HECKA stuff! Gosh, rich people! Lol. I bought a special gift for a special somebody. Hehe... Anyways, we all went our seperate ways after. Patty, Daniel, Diane and Bianca left while I drove Katelyn to her cousin's house in Milpitas. He lives hecka close to me! Katelyn said that since her family isn't in West Coast anymore, they might buy a house in Milpitas. She's gonna be living hecka close to me! Lol. She also told me that Justin Baltazar lives really close to me too. Yum.
     Anyways, after I dropped her off, I went to Staples and bought a bunch of school supplies. Yay! Lol. Then I headed back home and now I'm here.
     For some odd reason today, I'm really craving to hang out with Axell. After dinner, Axell and I are gonna surprise Jen at her house. YOU BETTER ACT SURPRISED JEN! Lol.
     I'm excited for PCI to start! We already got homework! Lol.
     -Banhzaii