from the group. I'll probably see them on the occasion, but I definitely need a break. I need time off to recuperate my thoughts, to re-evaluate my morals, to regenerate my motives on school.

Although it has only been 2 weeks since school began, I feel as though I'm already slacking off, I'm not doing as well as I hoped I would. I'm getting bored of school and getting tired of it's tedious schedule. Wake up at 7:10, Carpool and leave by 7:50. Math, Accounting, French, English 8:30-12:20. Wait an hour. Go home. I mean, yeah, my schedule isn't really that bad, but it's just that same repetition everyday. Nothing eventful happens, just the same stuff over and over. I think that's what's making me tired. I have no inspiration to do homework or to study, but I know I need to. I need to take a break so I can get back on track. 

You know, I love the group, they're a bunch of great people. Probably not common sense smart, but they're pretty smart. At times, certain people just annoy me. When that happens, it causes me to say things that I might regret and to act a certain way. I can't help it, that's just who I am. When that happens, I need to take some time off. It's fun hanging out with them, but not fun when you realize that the money in your wallet is slowly depleting into nothingness. Yeah I know.. I shouldn't really say anything because Timmy pays for the majority of my things, but still, I don't want him to spend money on me on useless things when he could be saving it for his benefits. Like school, I feel as though we do the same things when we hang out, which usually includes Pearl Milk Tea or loitering. Honestly, it gets boring after a while. So I need time off, to remember why I like hanging out with them, because at this point, with all the drama happening around, it's not really fun anymore.. 

I dunno, I just don't want to hang around them right now. Going out every night, coming home just before 12, staying up till 1. That's not the schedule that I idealized. I need to go back into that mindset of doing my homework and being rewarded greatly. My parents are beginning to question my motives on school and if I'm really taking it seriously. I don't want them to think I'm slacking off and restrict me from a lot of things. I feel the need to gain their trust back. 

It's a lot to take in. I'm not going to be gone completely, I just need a vacation. There will be those off chances that I'll be at a certain event, but casual hangouts are probably going to be eliminated for now, unless I honestly have nothing to do. 

Time to get back to writing my essay. Ugh, no inspiration to write it.. at all. 



Leave a Reply.