About inviting Kevin to my SD trip. I Honestly thought that he wouldn't be able to make it, that's why I invited him... Oh gosh. I should've just told him, "Sorry Kevs, it's a trip for myself" Gahh. What to do.. Should I just ignore him and pretend I forgot about inviting him? Or should I just tell him that I wasn't being serious? I'm so mean!
from the group. I'll probably see them on the occasion, but I definitely need a break. I need time off to recuperate my thoughts, to re-evaluate my morals, to regenerate my motives on school.
Although it has only been 2 weeks since school began, I feel as though I'm already slacking off, I'm not doing as well as I hoped I would. I'm getting bored of school and getting tired of it's tedious schedule. Wake up at 7:10, Carpool and leave by 7:50. Math, Accounting, French, English 8:30-12:20. Wait an hour. Go home. I mean, yeah, my schedule isn't really that bad, but it's just that same repetition everyday. Nothing eventful happens, just the same stuff over and over. I think that's what's making me tired. I have no inspiration to do homework or to study, but I know I need to. I need to take a break so I can get back on track.
You know, I love the group, they're a bunch of great people. Probably not common sense smart, but they're pretty smart. At times, certain people just annoy me. When that happens, it causes me to say things that I might regret and to act a certain way. I can't help it, that's just who I am. When that happens, I need to take some time off. It's fun hanging out with them, but not fun when you realize that the money in your wallet is slowly depleting into nothingness. Yeah I know.. I shouldn't really say anything because Timmy pays for the majority of my things, but still, I don't want him to spend money on me on useless things when he could be saving it for his benefits. Like school, I feel as though we do the same things when we hang out, which usually includes Pearl Milk Tea or loitering. Honestly, it gets boring after a while. So I need time off, to remember why I like hanging out with them, because at this point, with all the drama happening around, it's not really fun anymore..
I dunno, I just don't want to hang around them right now. Going out every night, coming home just before 12, staying up till 1. That's not the schedule that I idealized. I need to go back into that mindset of doing my homework and being rewarded greatly. My parents are beginning to question my motives on school and if I'm really taking it seriously. I don't want them to think I'm slacking off and restrict me from a lot of things. I feel the need to gain their trust back.
It's a lot to take in. I'm not going to be gone completely, I just need a vacation. There will be those off chances that I'll be at a certain event, but casual hangouts are probably going to be eliminated for now, unless I honestly have nothing to do.
Time to get back to writing my essay. Ugh, no inspiration to write it.. at all.
I can't stand people who can't clean up after themselves.
I fucking hate how my sister comes home whenever she wants and makes a mess out of everything. She's so inconsiderate. All she ever thinks about it herself. Ughh. This is seriously pissing me off. What pisses me off even more is that I never catch her in the act. She's never home when I'm home. I'm seriously gonna call her out if she does it again and I see her. I'm gonna call her out so badly.
What the fuck is your problem? You come home, you make a goddamn mess out of everything, and you just leave expecting people to pick up after your shit. The world doesn't revolve around you. You're so lucky that you have us as your siblings because you know we wont say anything, but I'm pissed off to the point where I'm gonna call her out and steal her keys so she can't leave. I'm gonna take her shit so she can't wear it or use it.
Ughh, there's more I want to rant about, but I know I have to get my hw done. Maybe I'll rant later
Much has happen this past year. So much happiness, drama, tears, whatever. It's just amazing on all the stuff that's been going around in my life right now. I can't summarize everything in one blog. I honestly don't know where to start, so I guess I'll just start from today on. All my feelings, rants, etc will be posted on this page.. hopefully I remember to let it all out though.
A wave of emotions have recently came over me and I feel like I need to let it out to cope with it. Talking to Timmy isn't enough, I need to put it down somewhere where I can look back and reflect of it. Where I don't have to repeat myself or tell the same story over and over again to countless numbers of people. I know I've tried to make my Weebly a positive blog, but like life, things change, events occur, memories are made.